you’re alright!

I have a rant to share on behalf of children everywhere.

From the child I was & from the adult I am now…

If a child falls, slips, bumps their head, scrapes their knee or otherwise hurts themselves they are the ones who can decide if they are alright, or not!

If a child is frightened. If a child is hurt. If a child is lonely. If a child is sad. If a child is angry. THEY are the ones who can decide if they are alright, or not!

Too many times I’ve seen children be told,

“You’re alright…”

when it’s clear they are not.

When a child shows signs of distress – if they cry, if they wimper, if there is a tremor in their voice, if there are tears in their eyes, if they yell, if they fall silent, if they seem at all “not alright” – it’s a good idea to offer comfort, rather than tell them they’re alright.

It doesn’t matter if you think they should be alright because you think they didn’t fall too far, didn’t hit their head too hard, didn’t bleed so much or you think the dark is just not scary. THEY are they ones who can decide if they are alright, or not!

“You’re alright…” is invalidating & dismissive.

Try,

“Are you alright?”

“Would you like a cuddle?”

“Can I help?”

“Do you want to tell me about it?”

Try validating them, try hearing them, try understanding them, because THEY are the ones who can decide if they are alright, or not!

posted by wildecrafted in journal and have Comment (1)